He is a good Husband But not a good lover.

Today my husband and I had a heated discussion. It was going with some times or I can say it is going on, and I want to stop at some place. Every time we had this last statement I felt that I was thinking wrong.

This time I sat and tried to understand if I was the person who was wrong here. He is a good father, he is a good man, and never raised his voice on me until we had heated one. He is a provider for the family, House, Food, and Education for his kid. What else is needed from him? I have expectations from him, those expectations girls have from lovers?

Lover the person in your life is like a cloud that is too good to rain only on you not anywhere else. where the husband is the person who rained everywhere, for him, his parents, his friends, and his office, in short word wife is part of his life and for the Lover, the girlfriend is his life.

So yes I am expecting things from the wrong person or he is the right person my explanations are wrong, he is doing his best and I am the person who is causing the issues.

When I realized I said sorry and stupidly I said that you are a good Husband but not a good lover and that hit the wrong spot, for him he is best in all ways, and it took me some time to make him realize what I am trying to say, I am not sure what he understands but at the end, he is like ok let’s go with that way. And I am yeah let’s see we can skip some heated ones.

PS: I have arranged marriage, I shared all my concerns but it seems he did not understand at that time what I was looking for , we got 7 days to decide and as per his answers I assumed he was on board but now I changed the side of the table let’s see.

Save Earth

Save Earth it’s a good concept which everybody needs to understand. We are the ones who are polluting the earth. At my time of schooling, they did not teach those concepts. My son is in kindergarten and they are teaching him this thing, I am happy, and when he makes this I feel proud.

He learns things like through the dirty in the trash, doesn’t through the dirty in rivers, uses public transport so we can make less air pollution, don’t loud, don’t horn the cars, these all things helps to make earth happy. Good things right. We teach kids and expect them to apply in life. Sometimes there are punishments if they don’t do as we are teaching.

So here is the problem we are teaching them all the good things to save the earth, but same time we are teaching them don’t apply in real life. For example, no loud, no vehicle horns during the traffic but is it possible. No, I did that and others too, when he ask not to do or why I making noise pollution so… I have nothing to say, what should I explain to him. For rituals purpose at my place we have to take bath in the river, we through things into the river again he is there why?

There are lots of things it’s only some of them, there are lots of why it’s good to teach them. But it will be perfect if whatever we are teaching first we apply in our life and then teach them. Because here we are giving them the wrong impression, whatever you learn not for life, Is this right? I try, yes very difficult but still, I decided to teach him with the actions.

Acceptance ?

Solution of the problem or Starting of the problem?

The first sentence covers all, when I think about, I feel, I am on two boats. there is something which I accept happily, and some are which I don’t want to accept, but I have too. That is the reason I came up with this thought

It happens to everyone, even it happened with you also, but there is a slite twist which I observe for myself, I want people to accept me the way I am, but when it comes to me, I accept them on my conditions, please don’t judge me, being a human I am what I am (see I told you 😛)

So the first point, the cause of the issues is, if they accept me, I am happy, and we are good, but when they don’t accept boom. On the other side of the coin, when I open my heart for someone, you must do the same thing, whether you want or not, but I did so you need to, otherwise boom. (See being a human 😜) . That is the personal thing, so most personal problems come into this criteria either its origin or its end, but simple Acceptance.

When it comes to society, there are lots of unwritten rules. When we accept them, we are in there. Otherwise, you are out. Sometimes the rules are solutions for people, but sometimes they are not. The rules are by the people for the people, like “Marriage in early age when they are kid”. Some people still follow it. If you don’t, they will force you or punishment.

The moral of the story, you have to accept.

Being a people or society, we accept those things which are unacceptable. Family violence, criminals, especially child abusers, Why we allow them. Everyone deserves a second chance, but if someone is not changing himself and threat to the people, then why are we Accepting?

We have lots of things around us, like an Autistic person/kid, physically challenged one, the people who are in some kind of trauma or witness of any crime, But we don’t want to accept them in our home. We ignored them, let them feel left alone. The worst we say bad words in front of them. You have no idea how it feels. Things happen, but that’s not their fault, but we name it like that. We accept the criminal but don’t want to the victim. Why do we have that kind of thinking? We are good, sensible people, but still, we are doing this kind of discrimination.

What we want to accept, is a personal choice. But please do accept the person who is in pain. The pain is not by choice. he gets it, can say by luck or someone did. But now he is with him, we can not take the pain, but when we accept him as he is, that gives him something good.

Acceptance comes from the heart, not from the mind. It’s the way I think. it may vary for everyone as per their surroundings. I love to hear you, What is your acceptance.