Today my husband and I had a heated discussion. It was going with some times or I can say it is going on, and I want to stop at some place. Every time we had this last statement I felt that I was thinking wrong.
This time I sat and tried to understand if I was the person who was wrong here. He is a good father, he is a good man, and never raised his voice on me until we had heated one. He is a provider for the family, House, Food, and Education for his kid. What else is needed from him? I have expectations from him, those expectations girls have from lovers?
Lover the person in your life is like a cloud that is too good to rain only on you not anywhere else. where the husband is the person who rained everywhere, for him, his parents, his friends, and his office, in short word wife is part of his life and for the Lover, the girlfriend is his life.
So yes I am expecting things from the wrong person or he is the right person my explanations are wrong, he is doing his best and I am the person who is causing the issues.
When I realized I said sorry and stupidly I said that you are a good Husband but not a good lover and that hit the wrong spot, for him he is best in all ways, and it took me some time to make him realize what I am trying to say, I am not sure what he understands but at the end, he is like ok let’s go with that way. And I am yeah let’s see we can skip some heated ones.
PS: I have arranged marriage, I shared all my concerns but it seems he did not understand at that time what I was looking for , we got 7 days to decide and as per his answers I assumed he was on board but now I changed the side of the table let’s see.
M and W were so much in love, everything is perfect between them, they have the same hobbies, same test. They are soul mates.
Both are working, they start their day with exercise, coffee and then go to the office, they come back home, watch tv or a little gossip and bed. They have a cute dog who is all alone in day time but with M and W his night is good. They have a sweet little family.
M and W had little arguments like W wants M help for cooking, and M suggests appointing a cook. M wants family involvement for that W agrees but on her terms, with W terms M is not agreed. In short as a married couple they have differences but they are in love.After some time they get pregnant, for that W moves to her family. During that time for the first time M and W are apart, but M traveled to W, when M traveled to W he also visited his parents house.
W has no problem with this visit, as M and W’s parents are fully involved in their relationship.But there is little twist, M and W both have expectations with each other, at the same time they are liking No responsibility zone. They are still talking on the phone but slowly they are feeling disconnected. After some time they were blessed with a baby and W got busy at work, baby and she expected help from M. M suggests the same thing appoint cook, have day care or quit the job. For that W was not ready, here M started complaining about her to his mother and the same W is sharing her being to her mother, both mothers are taking sides or their children so instead of husband and wife it became family drama.
W left M place with the baby and started her life at her mother’s place. She is trying that M apologizes and takes them home but M decides to divorce her. W is not saying sorry she is asking to get it back together and take care of the baby as parents. But M is saying you are no good for me.
W is now single mother and take ok ng care of her baby, M wants to talk his baby on phone and if he got custody then his mother will take care of baby.M started hiking, parting, new friends circle, traveling on holidays, new hobbies and when he need to talk, share his feeling or daily conversation he calls his mother and have long conversation. In short M is enjoying bachelor life and he is not missing his soul mate, Why ?
With this As I understand when you become parents, mother fathers both need to sacrifice, it’s not only mother so M’s expectation is wrong. Next is if you have issues don’t involve your third that makes things worse.
W should be ready for something like a cook, no harm in that, the same M should talk to W only yes family friends all are important but no one is replaced with a life partner. Here M replaced W with his mother, he started sharing his emotions, daily thoughts and even private things with his mother. So how can he miss W, he cooks in the morning then the office after that call to mother to share all day things then tv and good night. It’s all finished when he will miss her? (Instead of a mother you can add any third person )
You miss your life partner when you want to share your moments, your emotions, when you need a shoulder to cry to sleep, but all those things if you share with a third then I don’t think you will miss your life partner.
Nowadays divorce is very common, yes in marriage there are differences. Sometimes the husband is not happy with the wife and wife with the husband, but you can deal with each other, if those differences are small like M and W. If I try to see the bigger picture then M is busy in his life and replaces W with a third, W is busy in her life and she replaces M with baby, how and when they will miss each other.
Maybe you have a different perspective, I feel that way and I share it with you, if you have other thoughts share them with me.
Right now I need hope only hope in my life. I give up on everything, whatever I try I did but nothing I get it.
I did my best in whatever place I was, I try to give my best. As in view give your best that does not matter where you are, if you are in office or kitchen or taking care of kids or doing something which you don’t like But if you are doing give your best. There should be no retreat if I put more effort outcome would be different No give your best and then accept the outcome.
But feels like it is not right at all. I gave my best, and accept the outcome even sometimes with the sacrifices still, I have blamed and that is the person who said he understands me more than anybody. How and why….. After that, I have nothing to say or do.
My kid does not understand anything, he is too innocent. So he came to me and ask what happen and why your not smiling so out of nowhere I just said to him I gave up baby. I feel bad but the words are out and it’s in his mind. Now I am feeling how I am going to erase this thing, I am a bad mother how can I teach my child this.
He ran away and I started thinking about what to do now. What’s done it’s done, you can not change anything but after 15 min he came back with the paper and pen and he said I write you something amma and showed me. I have no words only a big smile with tears. I just Thank God for giving me such a precious gift and hugging my son.
Today I want to share with you, look around your hope is with you, open your eyes you can see.
He is 5 so he makes the speeling don’t go missing e just feel the imotions😊
We need to teach our kids about everything, sometimes the most difficult one in the simplest form. The same happens to me.
Last night my son ask How come dada is a husband and I am a son, we both are boys🤔
Me: I marry him so he is my husband one day you will get married so you become a husband.
My son: Whom I am going to marry?
Me: A girl, whom you like, love. She loves you, care for you.
My son: No I don’t want to marry, I already married with you. You are not dada’s wife you are my wife.
I feel happy but then I did something which he is not going to forgive me in the future. I make a video of all this conversation and decided that whenever he will come to me with his would-be then I will show him this video and deny his marriage saying you are already married😂
If something happens with you, do share. Keep enjoying life😊😊
Hum sath hai Raat din subha shaam Hum sath hai Tum office ke kaam me Mai ghar ke sath mashgul Hum sath hote hai table par Par TV.. bacha.. bi sath hai Hum har paal sath hai COVID ne humra sath or bi bada Diya Ab to charo pahar hum sath hai Phir…. Phir bi wahi shikayat… Phir bi wahi kasmkash… Muje tumhara sath Mila Par waqakt nhi Tum dekh sakti par kha kuch nhi sakti Tum sath hokar bi door ho Tum ho mere aas pass Par awaz dekar kuch kha nhi sakti Ab to phone bi nhi ki puch lo Aaj kab aauge Mere sath hi ho Par Is sath me wo sath khi chot gaya Wo intazaar khi chala gaya Ab to baat karne ko kuch nhi Par bhut kuch khna hai Shikayte hai, shikwa hai Par khne ko shabd khi kho gaye Jane kyu is sath se wo apnapaan khi kho gaya Kese kho tumse ki Aaj mai tumhe dekh choo sakti hu Par kuch kha nhi sakti Jaane kyu……..
I love her when I was kid, then I don’t love her when I was teen now again I love her…
But in all of this, she always love me, that was mistry for me
But now I am a mother, and that resolved it.
I couldn’t become like my mother but I want her, a little in me.
Love you mom, Happy birthday. ❤️❤️
When I am writing these lines, a lot is going on in my mind. I can not describe her in some words. She is a strong woman. She has seen lots of ups and downs in her life. Always teach us how to hold the raft and don’t let ourselves drown. She is always with me, holding my back and, saying don’t worry about the world I with you.
All the mothers are like that no matter how their kids behave with them, still, they love them. The whole world is against you, but you find your mother with you. That’s the mother ❤️
Funny thing, when I said these lines to my mother, she grabbed my ear and said “you are not that big” After looking at all these, my little one is so happy he said, “Nani is bigger than amma” 😜😍
I live in the apartment no trees around. Nowadays, it’s hard to see birds in the nest and impossible for my kid to see any bird in the nest. For him, birds fly or live in cages 😦 . Luckily on my balcony, a bird makes the nest. My husband said, “We must stop the bird. Otherwise there will be eggs, and if eggs fall then, that hearts me” he is right. Still, I promise him to take care of the bird and my son, so birdy and my monkey don’t disturb each other. Since the bird making her nest, each day is different for me. The more I am with her, the more I feel connected. It amazes me the complete process of Motherhood, whether it’s a bird or human. It’s God’s gift 🙂 . I thought, let’s give words to that feeling.
My balcony is full of plants maybe that attract the bird. She keeps coming and sitting for hours. After three-four days, I notice that she is making a nest. What a fine architect she is. She gave proper support to the nest as it is only on one thin base and tightly tied with the iron bars and makes it safe as much as possible. In 6 to 7 days, she completes it. When I see her making the nest, getting all the soft stuff for would-be babies, I remember those days How I was preparing my baby’s nursery.
Nest is all ready…
The nest is all ready, and she did not move at all. I realized that she laid eggs. She flies away for some time then comes back, she won’t go too far, whenever I reach my balcony she comes back from nowhere. I can understand her, she is going to be a mother, and for now, her only job is to take care of herself and her babies. Sometimes I see another bird with her, and that one comes only to give her food. My son called that bird a dady bird, who flies away because he goes office. During my pregnancy, my husband used to do the same thing before leaving for the office, he arranged all of my stuff in an easy-access way. He never forgets about my craving stuff and baby carrot. Human or animal, End of the day, we are parents.
Eggs are hatching, and a tiny winy cute birdy is out. That’s the most beautiful moment. My kid is so happy, all day he is shouting. Every single time when the bird is out for food, he climbs up and starts looking at the babies. Now we have names Mumma bird, a baby bird, and a dada bird. Now Mumma bird comes with food, and babies open their mouths in the air for the food. Nobody teaches them what to do, but they know, just like the first time I feed my baby, and he knows what to do. At my time, I had this question, how my newborn knows to have milk, and my doctor says, don’t worry about that. After a half-hour of delivery, I nursed my baby, and that was the most satisfying feeling. I get it there are things which we don’t need to teach.
Now my morning starts with them. They chirping early in the morning. It’s so calming, peaceful, wake up like that. I am not an early riser, but now birdies are my alarm, and without snooze, I wake up and have tea with them. Baby birds are growing too fast, and now they are big and have no space for Mumma. When the Mumma bird is not in the nest, babies try to jump. That scares me, so I can imagine how scary for the Mumma bird. I observe one thing whenever Mumma bird is out for food, she keeps chirping so the baby bird can hear her, it’s my assumption, but with that sound, at least the babies don’t try to jump. When I see the naughty baby birds, that give me a sense The moment kids start feeling independence, they start their things, and being a parent our job is to keep saying No word. So I think Mumma bird is doing the same when she is not in the nest but keeps making a sound from far away 😛.
Baby birds
Birds are ready to fly, and soon they will be in the sky and leave their empty nest behind with their sweet memories. I am gone miss them. I can feel what the Mumma bird will feel. I correlate myself with her, a baby born, you raised him with all your love and care, one day he flies away that’s what you teach him, but in your deep heart you want to stop that, you want to hold the moment, you wish that your love one grows slow but it never going to happen they grows fast and now ready to fly. It’s a happy moment that your loved one is now in the world on their own you taught him well, A proud Parent, and sad because now they are not with you. I have no words to explain that feeling. I can only feel it. The day you become a parent, you assuredly feel it. With this feeling, I want to enjoy every single moment with my son.
Thanks to God, he gave us such a beautiful life and such beautiful emotion. When you feel it, you realize how pure the parents and kid relation is. It’s a responsibility, and God blessed us with that. Newborn to a flying bird, every moment is precious. When your little one reaches the sky, that’s the moment you feel proud and say, We did well.
In India we celebrate The Rakhi festival you can say as Brother Sister day, where Sister tie a thread on Brother’s hand and Brother promise her To protect her. ( Life long bodyguard )
I have three brothers, my childhood is little complicated but when I recall time with brothers it was always amazing. We used to fight, fight a lot. Even still if we are in a room after some time we started again. We never agree at one point although we let it go things but never agree, that’s the beauty of this relationship You are not agree with each other Still you are Together. You always have your back no matter what happen.
You got friend when you start going out, but the day you born or your sibling you get a friend. He or she knows you Truly. You have all emotions love, jealous, frustration(it’s your sibling who introduced you with this feeling).
Think about it, you need motherly care or you want girl suggestion who is your first thought It’s Your Sister. you want somebody to protact you like father, but don’t want any restrictions like father who is your Men, Your Brother. That’s the Brother and Sister. Substitute of Mother and Father but without any No word, Without any asking just Be with you and Done. You can share anything with them.
I want this amazing feeling for my son, we decided to have only one kid So I always wonder how can I express this feeling to him, Thanks to god my sister-in-law blessed with cute little princess, the day she born I feel my kid got his best gift for his life. He called her little sister and He called him self Big Brother. He loves her, he was 4 year old when she born, he is soo frightened to touch her. He said I could heart her she is soo tiny. When first time he touch her, he uses his one figure only and said to me ‘Amma See She is happy’. When ever she cries he angry on me. To see them together I have no words for them, like my kid is 4 and she is newborn but still when they are together they know each other. At that day I realized That Emotion you can not express it, you can only feel it.
Thought Fountain 